Join the Secret Wives Club for the best marriage ever!
Respect is a major trigger word in all relationships, but especially between husband and wife. Avoid pent-up resentment and discover the positive effects of respect!

In this episode, Leah tackles the next section of Marriage Secrets, pgs. 26-27, which describes her first foray into teaching about marriage and the first major issue that crops up: R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Tune in for the first 6 minutes to hear the relatable story in her own words, beginning right away at timecode 0:00!

Leah’s Points to Ponder:
• Torah sources may sometimes contradict modern gender role beliefs…but Torah is what works!
• “A woman must respect her husband exceedingly.” (Rambam)
o Does this rub you the wrong way?
o Look at your history- has waiting for your hubby to respect you born fruit?
o Just try it!
• Men need respect like oxygen- giving him that air will transform your home.

Viewer Questions:
Chaya: What if your husband makes it difficult to respect him? How do you respect him if it’s not really deserved?
Leah: Respect is always granted, never earned. End of story. This is a guaranteed principle passed over 3,000 years.

Chaya follows up: What are some practical tips to start “faking” your respect for him?
Leah: There are so many things you can do. Here are a few:

• Compliment him.
• Say nothing when you feel an urge to criticize.
• Show gratitude and appreciation.
• Don’t interrupt when he’s speaking.
• Rebuke kids who interrupt or are disrespectful of him.
• Never disagree with him in front of the kids.

Doing these things will bring out the best in your husband.

Jacqueline asks: In my first marriage, respect from my husband didn’t exist. How can I bring it into my marriage now?
Leah: You need to sit down with your ex-husband and in a kind, soft way give him specific behaviors you need to see from him, for the sake of your kids (i.e. please don’t put me down in front of the kids, etc.). There are books on how to have an amicable divorce and raise kids with an ex and you need to read as much as you can on it. This is so important!

Susie asks: How do you stay motivated to respect your husband if you don’t see any changes in him?
Leah: It’s not about changing your husband; it’s about changing yourself. Realize that any improvement in your life overall is directly tied to how much you respect your husband. We know this from the mesorah (tradition). It is guaranteed from G-d.

Try This at Home:
Compliment your husband at least once this week.