Do you ever feel like life is one never-ending list of tasks that leaves no time for the people in your life? Does just reading that sentence exhaust you?

Join Leah as she begins Chapter 9 of Marriage Secrets with pages 205-209. Get ready to learn how to have deeper connections amidst the hecticness of life.

Leah’s Points To Ponder:

• Listen in at 00:46 for a story which represents how a harried life leaves little room for closeness…yet shows that it is still possible!
• Realizing that every obstacle is a test from G-d gives us the ability to overcome it all.
• When we feel gratitude, we’re more able to keep people close to us.
• We have adopted the mentality that our worth is commensurate with the ticks on our to-do list.
• Our drive to accomplish has overtaken our need for connection. This gift has become a stumbling block which brings isolation.
• We do what is urgent, not what is important. It’s time to make a shift!

Viewer Questions:

Tzippy: You’re right! Life is always so hectic. I am so exhausted all the time, and making time to be with my husband feels too hard. He is exhausted too and just wants to vegetate without talking.

Leah: The point we’re making is that if you don’t make a vast adjustment to your schedule, your connection to each other suffers. What is your real priority in life? Listen in at 12:59 to hear how to have a blame-free conversation to bring that connection back.

Esti: I feel so detached from my husband! It’s been over a decade of us just living parallel lives…It’s just easier that way. I don’t even know where to start. Do you have any advice for me?

Leah: Without connection, there must be a lot of frustration and tension. If you’re very far removed, then it needs proper couple’s therapy. If you just mean that you’d like to connect more, we have lots of tips coming up!

Ayelet: Is it too much to realistically expect my husband and I to connect every single day? As you say, every day is so hectic that my husband and I only really connect deeply once a week on a date or on Shabbos.

Leah: Gedolim (Great Rabbis) say you need at least 10 minutes a day of real connecting. Either at dinner, on the phone while commuting, or whatever fits with your life. If you don’t do this, you can be in the same room and feel totally alone. Tune in at timecode 19:25 to hear a study which represents how it’s the little daily interactions that build closeness! When he’s busy, bring him a glass of water to build those small moments of closeness.

Bayla: I know that a cornerstone of communication with our husband is putting the problem in his lap. Whenever I try to do this, my husband gets very upset and says, “Why are you making this my problem and putting it all on me?” What am I doing wrong?

Leah: This sounds like it needs a sales job. Showing him where you’re coming from properly will be a gamechanger- timecode 22:05 will show you how to sell it like a pro!

Yehudis: When my husband and I try to connect in the evenings, we often end up arguing, because we’re both so tired and burnt out from our busy days that bickering is easier than connecting. Should we avoid trying to connect until we’re better rested?

Leah: 1000%. That makes the home an unsafe place. It may take some trial and error but figure out a time that works. Tune in at 24:38 for examples of how to make connecting time work even when work gets in the way of connecting.

Try This At Home:

One time this week when you see you’re trying to accomplish something at the expense of connecting, choose connection.