Don’t you ever wish you could understand your husband better!?
Join Leah for this spectacular Guest Show with Charlie Harary. Ladies, you’re in for a real treat as Mr Harary shares his powerful perspectives on marriage, going through challenges and how to access more joy in life.
Viewer Questions:
Leah: What is one thing that you feel women should know about their husbands or marriage?
- Women are much more complex than men and men often don’t understand the dynamics of a woman.
- Often, a wife assumes that she’s speaking to a male version of herself but they’re entirely different creations and this creates a lot of frustration.
- The avodain marriage is not to be heard but to hear.
- The more we try to understand our spouse, the better the marriage will be. Don’t listen to understand, listen to understand the person.
Tali: I’m going through something hard, and I know I should be focusing on the good but it’s so much easier said than done. Do you have practical tips for how to actually keep focusing on the good in my life even though I’m in pain.
- Focus on good when it’s good.
- We need to prepare and build our brains and our emunahbefore challenges to deal with challenges.
- Judaism is a religion of habits to habituate us because there’s no other way of getting to where our souls need to be.
Tova: We’re at a crossroads about whether we should have more kids or not. I’m leaning towards having more kids and my husband is hesitant because of finances. What should I do?
- This is a question for a Rov but people don’t build families on finances. Most people can’t afford the kids they have. Finances are in Hashem’shands and shouldn’t be put in front of what you believe in.
- Often, men are worried about their wives. The reason a man goes out to make money is to take care of his wife. If he feels she can’t handle another baby, he may be blaming it on finances because he doesn’t want to directly tell her this. Blaming it on finances might be his way of saying: “Are you sure you can handle it?” If she shows him that she copes well and has the capacity to run the household happily and smoothly, he may come around.
- Complaining less and showing more competence may help him feel more secure with the situation. Women often complain in order to receive validation, but men don’t hear this- they hear failure.
Avigayil: I’d love to hear your take on how to increase shalom bayis with my husband. Things are okay but I know there is more joy to be accessed. I just don’t know how to get there.
- Time together is crucial, so you don’t become two people living in the same house.
- Validating and complementing. The way to get it is to give it.
- Sometimes a wife might need to make an effort even when she feels it’s her husband’s job to. But be the change you want to see. Maybe she’s right and it’s not right, but Hashem has the scorecard, and He knows.
- Would we rather be right or would we rather be happy?
Try This At Home:
Get to a place where you’re doing 1 thing every single day in the area in which you want to grow.
Visit Charlie Harary’s website which sends daily reminders for you to work on something for 5 minutes each day, ultimately changing your life. justdo5.org
